An Adventure

I want to go on an adventure
I want my life to be an adventure
I want to be the man with no plan
I want to be free
I want to do new things
I want to change the world
You want to stop me.

Im Scared

Im scared that what i hear every sunday is true. How can so many people say they know something is true when i have a hard time even believing? I believed in santa clause, in magic, in aliens, and for a little while i believed in god. 

Im scared that i will never know the truth. 

Im scared that everything i do know is just a lie.

I pinch myself regularly to prove that im awake but im scared that nobody else does that anymore.

Im scared that people are asleep to whats actually happening. Im scared that im asleep too.

But i keep pinching myself and it still hurts. The thought of this all being real hurts more than anyone's pinches.

The thought that you really meant what you said in that letter. The thought that you're dissapointed in me for not seeing the world like you do, and the thought that maybe i never will.

It all scares me.

#14

ive never felt like this before
im not saying that in the cheesy, "i love you more
than anything", kind of way
because i dont
but this time its different

we didnt really meet
until about 4 months after we met
on a dark crowded dance floor
then officially at the party in june

it was early then
and its still early
but ive always known i would fall in love with you
and i still havent, but it will happen soon

i barely know you
but i feel we have so much in common
our friends say we are opposites
but i learned from the magnets in my science kit
that opposites attract
and this attraction is stronger
than the magnetic pull of the north pole

but this time its different
my hearts not just a magnet
this time my hearts a compass
and youre the north pole
and this time i feel like im being pointed in the right direction

#13

i am on a fence
thin as paper
balancing on one foot
on the tip of my toes
with the wind at both sides

its tug of war
and im the rope
im also the referee
i decide who wins

but i cant decide
between right and wrong
my senses are gone
fate tips the fence
i fall


and im trapped on one side.

#12

maybe im wrong
maybe my brain isnt working right
but at least im following my heart

in every movie ive seen
every book ive read
and life lesson ive learned
they have told me to follow my heart

i finally am, and they tell me im wrong.

#11

The first day of school they told me i could grow up
to be whatever i wanted
that decision haunted me for a while
I finally decided, and told them
"I want to be everything!"
they laughed and tore apart my adventurous heart
and i can only start to forgive them

they said you can grow up to be whatever you wanted
then they put you in a suit for two years
tell you to get married
and find a respectable job
"it's the only way to be happy"

the freedom was never really there
but if you choose freedom
"you're going to hell"

one of us is wrong, but either way
i'm growing up to be what i want to.

Love Is...

Love is kittens. It's cute for a little bit but then it just ruins things and makes babies.
Love is an empty notebook.
Love is a road trip to all your favorite places.
Love is the buttons on a button-up shirt.
Love is where you first noticed her.
Love is a ball of playdoh.
Love is what you wake up for when the alarm goes off at 5:30.
Love is the nervous feeling you get when she walks into the room.
Love is a dresser filled with all of your best clothes.
Love is a mathbook, loaded with problems.

Love is a mathbook.

What happens once you get past the problems? (does anyone really get past the problems?)
Love IS the problems. You learn from them.
You learn from each other.

Love is like learning calculus. You will never completely understand it, but you can know enough to pass.

Love takes time.

A 'Children's Garden' Where They Tell Us What We Can and Can't Grow

This is what my kindergarten teacher called a cookie person. She told us that we were old enough to draw detailed, realistic looking people. Back then I believed I knew how to draw. Back then this is how I viewed people. I liked my drawings simple. I liked my life simple!! I don't understand why we are expected to make everything so complicated when we get older. Simple is good. Simple is happy. So why is simple not enough?

Please Prove You're Not a Robot

I wish I could. I eat three meals a day. I sleep every night. My heart beats regularly.

I don't even know how I got here. They tell me it was some big explosion, or a magician in the clouds, but could robots be created by either? Maybe I'm not a robot after all. I wish this magician would just reveal his secrets because I'm sick of wondering how he did this trick.

I'm scared the magician will stay invisible forever.